BrownhillsBob's #365daysofbiking

On a bike, riding somewhere. Every day, rain or shine.

Posts tagged ‘depressed’

#365daysofbiking Harsh days indeed

Friday February 12th 2021 –  It’s been a hard week on the bike – cold, grim days, ice under the wheels and rain and snow.

Some weeks of commuting are like war: You push on, enduring them, trying not to become a casualty, stoically going forward as much as you can.

I was glad it was Friday and this week of bitter riding had passed. All I need right now are sunny days – even if cold – and a sight of some decent signs that this harsh season will end.

I was glad to be nearing home.

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#365daysofbiking A break in the weather

May 23rd – Over to Lichfield for some essential shopping and the closed state of the city was expected, but dragged me down. There was only one thing to rectify the gloom: A return via the country lanes of Wall, Chesterfield and Hilton.

On Bullmoor Lane I was caught in the briefest of short, sharp and intense showers, and it passed as quickly as it arrived, leaving nothing but sightly damp lanes and a beautiful partial rainbow.

Summer is fantastic.

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#365daysofbiking Gathering darkness

February 29th – Joy of joys it was raining again.

I returned to Brownhills via Catshill Junction in a darkening hour. The weather was getting to me, as was the lack of colour in my world.

I try to be, and stay a positive person at heart. I like to try to make this journal as positive about the places I got and things I see as possible. But of late, I seem to have done nothing but whinge about the weather.

But be in no doubt: Out there, right now, it’s pretty awful to be on two wheels.

These are some of the hardest weeks I’ve ever ridden, if I’m honest.

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#365daysofbiking Into the darkness

October 3rd – The sunset now is getting really, really early and is quite a shock.

That was a hard, wet and punishing ride into the wind. It was hard work after the week I’ve had.

The winter lights are on, the scarf is out of the drawer and the thermals are being checked and washed.

And so, into the dark I disappear for the worst half of the year.

I hate this, but you have to have the bad with the good, so here goes…

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#365daysofbiking The imperfection of being

July 6th – Feeling down, out for an evening ride to cheer myself up: Just a short loop up to Chasewater at dusk.

My stomach had been bad and I wasn’t feeling great, but the evening light did make me feel better at least.

Sometimes, in summer when the weather’s not great and you’re stuck in, it can be worse than being stuck in on a grey winter’s day. The feeling of a chance lost, of summer passing without you, can be painfully real.

But today, the sunset was beautiful, Chasewater and the canal did it’s best to catch my eye, and I remembered that after all, tomorrow is another, usually better, day.

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#365daysofbiking Fade to grey:

December 9th – A throughly grey unpleasant afternoon leeched into dusk as I took a spin around Chasewater, taking a break from my workload. I saw no deer, and even the birdlife seemed suppressed, perhaps due to the unpleasant wind.

It’s was utterly colourless, wet and my heart was heavy. Days like this get me down.

#365daysofbiking Darker now:

November 6th – Today was another day distant, so I felt proportionately better. Still in Redditch, the morning was dull but I headed down through Arrow Valley Park and was rewarded with the most beautiful autumn display; the colours were gorgeous and I was reminded that even when we’re desperately sad, nature is still doing stuff just to try and grab out attention and make us happy.

#365daysofbiking Homeward bound:

November 5th – I’d been in Redditch, a place I used to work lots but in recent years, hardly had been to at’s fair to say that following the events of the weekend, my heart wasn’t in life at all.

I didn’t get the camera out all day, until I returned to Shenstone – and there it was shining in the dark like a beacon.

This station is part of my soul and has been for 40 years. Coming back here after a hard day is reassuring, soulful, welcoming. 

Like Paul Simon, I sat on the railway station and reflected for a while. Then I got on my bike and rode, homeward bound.

#365daysofbiking Lost weekend:

October 14th – Sunday was again bad for most of the daylight hours, only improving during the late afternoon. The wind had again been strong, and continual rain again kept me in. I got things done though, and that in itself made me feel better.

Nipping out for the shopping I’d forgotten the day before, I noted the swan family by Pelsall Road where thriving, and they didn’t seem to mind the gloom.

I’m curious though, about Morris and his lights: They haven’t actually been on the last couple of days at least. I wonder if they’re broken? That’s sad if they are.

#365daysofbiking Into the black:

October 13th – A dreadful, wet and dull day during which I got absolutely none of the things done I wanted to. High winds and rain meant I was hemmed in and my mood deteriorated.

Slipping out purely from necessity in the evening to get shopping and a takeaway, I forgot half of what I needed and the takeaway I’d planned as a pick me up wasn’t available.

A somnambulant Brownhills, even at the early hour of 7pm didn’t help.

This autumn is mad. One minute it’s sun and shirtsleeves, the next it’s like a typhoon.

This does nothing for my mood.